im learning.

I’m learning its ok to not be ok, it is a concept that has taken a seat in my soul, and I’m finally allowing it to rest on the couch instead of trying to show it the front door.

I’m learning to acknowledge jealousy, to recognize that I am made a certain way, and to strive to go against that way will only cause me to continually fall and scrape my knees.

I’m learning to love who Kayla is, and to accept Jesus loves Kayla. Because I know that its only when I can successfully do this I will be the proud owner if something that cannot be bought or sold.

I’m learning joy. And that joy can be resting my chin on my hand because I have no energy to hold it up on my own, while my shoulders throb from the heat of the days sun on my back, listening to a friend talk about life. Joy doesn’t have to be this indescribable elation that involves frolicking through meadows singing at the top of my lungs (it can be but lets be honest, how often does that really happen?), it can be (and I stole this phrase from my grandma) simple joys. A song, slashing my feet in a puddle after it rains, a piece of chocolate,a cup of tea, or a quite moment with crickets’ singing me to sleep.

I’m learning Jesus always provides me with the right relationships, right when I need them. And that he gives me a support system that many would envy. I am so lucky how provided for I am.

I’m learning that I like to go to bed at 9pm, and that’s ok! I have so many fun stories to share, but those can wait till tomorrow, So on that note. goodnight ❤


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